Definitions
Definitions
 |
RhyneCats |
DEFINITIONS Women's English Yes = No No = Yes Maybe = No I'm sorry = You'll be sorry We need = I want It's your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now Do what you want = You'll pay for this later We need to talk = I need to complain Sure go ahead = I don't want you to I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, you moron! You're so manly = You need a shave and you sweat a lot You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about? Be romantic, turn out the lights = I have flabby thighs This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house I want new curtains = and carpeting, and furniture, and wallpaper Hang the picture there = NO, I mean hang it there! I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep Do you love me? = I'm going to ask for something expensive How much do you love me? = I did something today you're really not going to like I'll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV Is my butt fat? = Tell me I'm beautiful You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me Are you listening to me!? = [Too late, you're dead] Was that the baby? = Why don't you get out of bed and walk him until he goes to sleep I'm not yelling! = Yes I am yelling because I think this is important The same old thing = Nothing Nothing = Everything Everything = My PMS is acting up Nothing, really = It's just that you're such an asshole ============================================================================================= Men's English I'm hungry = I'm hungry I'm sleepy = I'm sleepy I'm tired = I'm tired Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you Nice dress! = Nice cleavage! You look tense, let me give you a massage = I want to fondle you What's wrong? = I don't see why you are making such a big deal out of this What's wrong? = What meaningless self-inflicted psychological trauma are you going through now? What's wrong? = I guess sex tonight is out of the question I'm bored = Do you want to have sex? I love you = Let's have sex now I love you, too = Okay, I said it, we'd better have sex now! Yes, I like the way you cut your hair = I liked it better before Yes, I like the way you cut your hair = $50 and it doesn't look that much different! Let's talk = I am trying to impress you by showing that I am a deep person and maybe then you'd like to have sex with me Will you marry me? = I want to make it illegal for you to have sex with other guys (while shopping) I like that one better = Pick any freakin' dress and let's go home! I don't think that blouse and that skirt go well together = I am gay ============================================================================================= More Quotes. "Fill your mouth up with marbles and make a speech. Everyday reduce the number of marbles in your mouth and make a speech. You will soon become an accredited speaker --- when you have lost your marbles." --- Brooks Hayes. ============================================================================================= HOW DO CRAZY PEOPLE GO THROUGH THE FOREST? THEY TAKE THE PSYCHO PATH. HOW DO YOU GET HOLY WATER? YOU BOIL THE HELL OUT OF IT. WHAT DO FISH SAY WHEN THEY HIT A CONCRETE WALL? DAM! WHAT DO ESKIMOS GET FROM SITTING ON THE ICE TOO LONG? POLAROIDS WHAT DO YOU CALL A BOOMERANG THAT DOESN'T WORK? A STICK. WHAT DO YOU CALL CHEESE THAT ISN'T YOURS? NACHO CHEESE. WHAT DO YOU CALL SANTA'S HELPERS? SUBORDINATE CLAUSES. WHAT DO YOU GET WHEN YOU CROSS A SNOMAN WITH A VAMPIRE? FROSTBITE. WHAT LIES AT THE BOTTOM OF THE OCEAN AND TWITCHES? A NERVOUS WRECK. WHERE DO YOU FIND A DOG WITH NO LEGS? RIGHT WHERE YOU LEFT HIM. WHY DO GORILLAS HAVE BIG NOSTRILS? BECAUSE THEY HAVE BIG FINGERS. WHY DON'T BLIND PEOPLE LIKE TO SKY DIVE? BECAUSE IT SCARES THE DOG. WHAT KIND OF COFFEE WAS SERVED ON THE TITANIC? SANKA WHAT IS DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A HARLEY AND A HOOVER? THE LOCATION OF THE DIRT BAG. WHATS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A GOLFER AND A BAD SKYDIVER? A BAD GOLFER GOES, WHACK, DANG IT!. A BAD SKYDIVER GOES DANG IT!! WHACK HOW DO YOU CATCH A UNIQUE RABBIT? UNIQUE UP ON IT. HOW DO YOU CATCH A TAME RABBIT? TAME WAY, UNIQUE UP ON IT. WHAT DO YOU CALL SKYDIVING LAWYERS? SKEET. WHAT GOES CLIP, CLOP, CLIP, CLOP, BANG, BANG, CLIP, CLOP, CLIP, CLOP? AN AMISH DRIVE-BY SHOOTING HOW ARE A TEXAS TORNADO AND A TENNESSEE DIVORCE THE SAME? SOMEBODY'S GONNA LOSE A TRAILER WHATS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A NORTHERN FAIRY TALE AND A SOUTHERN FAIRY TALE? A NORTHERN FAIRY TALE BEGINS: ONCE UPON A TIME A SOUTHERN FAIRY TALE BEGINS: YA'LL AINT GONNA BELIEVE THIS! ============================================================================================= Useless trivia It is estimated that Americans will consume 10 million tons of turkey on Thanksgiving Day. Due to turkey's high sulphur content, Americans will also produce enough gas to fly a fleet of 75 Hindenbergs from L.A. to New York in 24 hours. (Non-smoking flights, of course.) When the University of Nebraska Cornhuskers play football at home, the stadium becomes the state's third largest city. The characters Bert and Ernie on "Sesame Street" were named after Bert the cop and Ernie the taxi driver in Frank Capra's "It's A Wonderful Life." The microwave was invented after a researcher walked by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket. All 50 states are listed across the top of the Lincoln Memorial on the back of the $5 bill. Maine is the only state whose name is just one syllable. The longest place-name still in use is Taumatawhakatangihangakoauauotamateatuipukakapikimaungahoronukupokaiwenuakitanatahu, a New Zealand hill. An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain. Tigers have striped skin, not just striped fur. A dragonfly has a lifespan of 24 hours. A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds. It's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open. The giant squid has the largest eyes in the world. The name for Oz in the "Wizard of Oz" was thought up when the creator, Frank Baum, looked at his filing cabinet and saw A-N, and O-Z, hence Oz.
Steve and Brigid 
eMail Us